You’re more than just dysphoria and a target of transphobia (img source)
this is why I’m against the narrative of “being LGBT is defined by suffering, if you don’t suffer you don’t belong to LGBT or Pride”. it’s incredibly damaging to queer people, especially queer kids who are just figuring out how their sexuality or gender identity figures into their overall identity. this narrative shoves them back into the closet if they don’t suffer “enough”, and how much one must suffer is completely arbitrary
also hey most young folks dont have super diverse experiences under their belt yet due to being, like, young. there are only a few narratives of queer suffering out there, and thus the definition of queer suffering and what that looks/feels like is very narrow and doesn’t always apply to a lot of queer youth.
so, like, promoting the concept of “LGBTQ = suffering” means queer kids may not recognize when something they’re going through is because of their queerness, and disregard that and themselves even if it is.
also pressures queer kids to come out for the sake of suffering and feeling ‘valid’ even if they aren’t safe or ready to.
There’s this thing that happens with minority groups. We come together because of the discrimination but we stay together for the culture. But people seem to forget that – LGBTQIA+ people aren’t just together because we suffer, we’re together because we have something to celebrate in the uniqueness we share. There’s something fundamentally wrong about working towards a better world with less discrimination and then gatekeeping newer members of the community because we don’t feel they’re suffered enough. THAT WAS THE GOAL.
Every queer person you feel hasn’t suffered enough to qualify as queer is proof of a better world. A better world is what we said we wanted, but it’s not going to be what we get if we let our identities be defined by suffering.
Worth noting that when a group too strongly roots their identity in the idea of persecution you eventually get stuff like American Christians being convinced they are a persecuted minority
This also paints an incredibly bleak future where we will never not be suffering. Idk about you, but that’s not the future I’m trying to achieve.
a doctor parts skin with a careful touch, turns a tumor into shadow, and seals his patient once more with black threads.
a teenager buys black pills from the pharmacy, swallows one, lies back. they find themselves shrouded in darkness, and for the first time in a long time they sleep well. in the morning they wake under their covers, safe and warm.
a parent casts a shadow over their child, whose body overheats quickly. with the shadow protecting them, the child can walk safely under the sun, fearing neither sunburn nor heat stroke.
light moves swiftly, but darkness is everywhere, and all connected. white magic transportation moves its passengers at dangerous speeds; it’s black magic which harnesses the everywhereness of the dark and turns it into the safest and most efficient transportation known to life.
– Go in at the end of the month
– Buy the model of the year right before the model for the next year comes out (dealers get desperate to sell the old models)
– Refuse to put any money down. Say that if they ask you to put down money, you’ll leave
– Seriously. If they ask you to put down money say you need to go and walk out
– If there’s another dealership nearby, tell them that you’re walking there right after you leave
– If a deal seems unfair but you really like the car, tell them you’re going to another dealership and leave. Chances are, they’ll call back the next day with a better deal
– If possible, after the first call wait till the last few days of the month and they’ll likely call again with an even better deal
– Look around for family and friends that need a car. If you buy more than one car from the same dealership you’ll get a much better deal
– If a family member/friend is looking for a used car while you’re looking for a new car or vice versa, still get the used car from the same dealership
– If you decide to buy a new car after a few years, trade in the old car and buy a new one from the same dealership. Companies appreciate loyalty and will likely offer you a lower price
UPDATED
(My dad went to college for finance, more specifically he looked a lot at stocks and how to sell things for a maximum profit. He learned it from the perspective of the company but it also works in his advantage)
– When you walk into a dealership, the salesperson will immediately “be your friend”. They’ll act like it’s you and them against dealership – Sometimes a salesperson will offer to talk to the manager. This does not mean anything. Chances are, they’re going to have small talk for a few minutes and come back out – Carefully consider the usefulness of an extended warranty. You’re losing money unless there’s an accident or issue soon after you buy the car – This wasn’t so clear before, but you’re still going to have to pay a down payment. What you should refuse is a securing payment – The securing payment is a psychological trick. You feel more tied to the company so you’re more likely to buy from them – You’re extremely more likely to buy at the last place you go, but with the securing payment you’re less likely to go to another dealership due to a sense of commitment – A salesperson may say it’s a limited time deal. Most times, unless this is the last of that years model, or it’s a special event, the deal is not going away and will still be there if you decide to go back. It’s not necessarily a deal breaker, but you should be suspicious if it’s said to you – Save money by asking to buy the floor model. There’s no mileage on it, but it’s worth less because people have sat in it – Or, ask to buy the demo if you’re willing to buy a car with some mileage. The depreciation of the price is usually worth it – Each can get you a few thousand dollars off due to the fact that it is technically not a “new” car anymore – Always look at the websites and play around with the build a car, payment calculators, or anything other offered features. Make sure when you’re using it you look at the down payment and the number of months that you will be paying for the car over – Try to not buy a really obscure model because the trade in value will be lower – Get the maximum down payment you can afford to lower the interest cost – Look for a crash rating test. A 5 is going to get good trade in value, and is much safer
(This was written in NY so there might be exceptions in other states or countries)
Never mistake my casual dismal of children under the “I don’t like kids” banner to mean I don’t care for their welfare.
“I don’t like kids” means I don’t feel a particular affinity to children in a society that CONSTANTLY pushes the ideas of motherhood and maternity at me, trying to elicit socially appropriate responses from me regardless of how I feel about the situation. It means I don’t want the incredible responsibilities associated with child care and I do not desire to spend time with children.
But I will not tolerate abuse of children. Hitting, insulting, yelling and being dismissive of the needs of children are all forms of abusive and callous behaviour.
You don’t get to disrespect and abuse people just because they haven’t learned how to stand up to you and children at least deserve your basic fucking respect.
I may not love children, but if you treat children badly then I fucking hate you.
“can’t shake the devil’s hand and say you’re only kidding” is the most concise and powerful dismissal of people who are “jokingly” racist and i can’t believe it’s from a They Might Be Giants song
sky's stuff 